flap jack toffee mess

'Its strange there just isn't the same closeness, which sounds harsh, but I wont be keeping in contact with them after.'
'yea, I know what you mean, some friends you just breeze through during life and others you keep forever.'
'Did you bring a bottle of water today? I need to get one'
'Yes, when I got home last week, I put the cloudy lemonade I brought from M&S strait in the fridge, thought I would save it.'
'Good idea, M&S do some nice stuff, me and Sue tried their sticky toffee puddings the other week, melt in the mouth they were.'
'Oh nice, its just a bit pricy though, for a full shop, nice for some special items to spoil yourself with, I once tried to make sticky toffee pudding, it was such a disaster, it ended up being the consistency of a flap jack.'
'Oh dear, that doesn't sound too good, how did you make it?'
'Well, it was a steamed sponge, so I had to put the mixture in a pyrex bowel over a pan of boiling water, I have never done anything like it before.'
'Strange, I have not heard of that before either, where did you get the recipe?'
'An internet site, Pete's getting really into the internet, I personally don't trust it, especially after my uneatable flap jack toffee mess.'
'Oh Heather you are funny.'
'Desserts aren't my strong suit.'
'Its getting busy isn't it, for a Sunday'
'It is, I wonder where everyone is off too.'

Sadly I think I would have to agree

'Have you heard about that awful drunk racist woman on the news?'
'Oh Yes, Bill and I watched it the other night terrible wasn't it'
'I know, I was personally quite disturbed by it, and I was only watching the video, I think if I was their I would have had to get off the bus, I couldn't stand and listen.'
'Me too, really unsettling to see how hurtful and aggressive someone can be.'
'Yes, and did you see the Gentleman behind her, he was becoming quite distressed, it was just so offensive.'
'People can have an opinion but they must keep it to themselves. I feel so sorry for everyone around her.'
'And that poor child on her lap, she was shouting and swearing right into his ear.'
'Poor child, she was defiantly intoxicated too, she doesn't deserve to be a mother.'
'Oh Margret thats quite strong, but sadly I think I would have to agree.'
'I hear she has been arrested for verbal abuse and disturbing the peace.'
'Rightly so, I say'
'Oh here's my stop, see you tomorrow.' 

Back Seat

'The cool kids sit on the back seat.'
'If you say so.'
'So did you see her?'
'Yea it was so awkward, she was walking strait towards me and I was thinking shit here we go, but then she totally ignored me and went out the door, I don't know whats worse, her talking to me, or being ignored.'
'Oh mate sounds ruff.'
'She is still texting me, which is the fucked up thing, she appears to hate me in the light of day, but the texts keep coming.'
'Odd, I thought she really hated you, she has been chatting shit about you to everyone.'
'Oh cheers mate I assume that includes you then?'
'Well i have been mates with her for ages, way before you two got together, I lived with her in halls.'
'Suppose, the texts are just so regimented, like she has been planning them for days, so that no emotion is shown. Here look at this one.'
'Crap she really is pissed.'
'Yea but in an I don't give a shit way, its weird, if she still didn't give a shit, then why would she text?'
'Who knows, she does still talk about you a lot, its just all bad, I wouldn't read too much into it.'

Frenchies

‘But it’s my first time Tabitha I don’t want to look like a whore.’

‘Ok, then how about the white set with full briefs?’

‘How ridiculous can you be, white screams virgin!’

‘Oh yea, what undies do you want then? Thongs are too little and full briefs are too much.’ ‘I don’t know, what do guys like?’

‘You’re asking me?’

‘Oh yea, right I’m thinking frenchies, I overheard these older looking guys talking about frenchies the other day, they used the term hot over 50 times.’

‘ So frenchies it is, but hang on they’re a bit see-through aren’t they?’

‘Well I want to turn him on, but you’re right, I would feel far too much of a breeze down there.’